jay-s
scarface
Reg.: Jun 2001
Location: on road
Posts: 378 |
 even more news!
Bush Addresses the Nation to Defend Firebombing of Smurfs
Good evening. Before I take your questions, let me speak with the American people about the situation in Smurf Village.
This has been tough weeks in Smurf Village. Smurfalition forces have encountered serious violence. Some remnants of Gargamel's regime, along with Smurfbollah militants, have attacked coalition forces in the Smurf Village, incited by radical cleric Jokey Smurf. Jokey has assembled an illegal militia, and supports terrorist groups like Smurfas and Smurfbollah.
Most Smurf Villages, by far, reject violence and oppose Smurftatorship. The Smurf Governing Council wants their Smurfdependence, and they want the freedom to Smurf as they choose. Smurfvereignty will be placed where it belongs: in Smurfy hands.
Smurfs must assume responsibility for their own Smurfdependence. Smurfalition forces are allowing members of the Smurf Governing Council to restore central Smurfority. Papa Smurf is communicating with the insurgents to ensure an orderly Smurfover. Jokey Smurf must answer the charges against him and disband his illegal Smurflitia.
When the flag of free Smurf Village is raised, Smurfs will assume full responsibility for the affairs of Smurfvernment. On that day, a new Smurfstitution and bill of Smurfs will take full effect.
According to the schedule already approved by the Smurf Governing Council, Smurfs will hold Smurflections in a national Smurferendum to elect a permanent government -- an event that will mark the completion of Smurf transition from Smurftatorship to Smurfdependence. 17 of NATO's 26 members are contributing forces to maintain Smurfcurity.
Neighboring villages are also responsible to make their region more stable. The Deputy Secretary of State is discussing our common interest in a free Smurfdom with the Bugaloos and the Snorks. Coalition forces are there to help protect the Smurfs from external aggression and internal Smurfbotage.
Smurfdependence is vital because Smurfs have as much right to live in freedom as we do. A free Smurf Village will stand as an example to Witchypoo, Snidely, and other cartoon dictators throughout the region.
Now is the time, and Smurf Village is the place, in which the enemies of the Smurfilized world are testing our will. We must not waver.
Smurf you all.
__________________
"It's dark. That tune's never left my head. That tune is still going around my head from the first time I heard it. And the thing about those drums: they're still the future. It's not a lost art – people still don't know how to do those drums. It's an unknown thing. It's like the last fucking secret left in music: how you do those drums. I've tried. I've locked myself away and tried. And the thing about garage is: the more you look at it like some tech-boy producer, the less you get it."
~Burial
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12-10-2005 - 12:53
