mat
sound.selectah
Reg.: May 2001
Location: planet.funk!
Posts: 1767 |
 male/female shower routine
> Subject: How to Shower like a Woman/Man
>
>
> How to Shower like a Woman:
> 1. Take off clothing and place it in a sectioned
> laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
> 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
> If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed area.
> 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -
> make mental note to do more sit-ups.
> 4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofa,
wide loofah and pumice stone.
> 5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43
added vitamins.
> 6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
> 7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with
natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15
> minutes.
> 8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrubs for 10 minutes
until
red.
> 9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
> 10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
> 11. Shave armpits and legs.
> 12. Turn off shower.
> 13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
> Spray mold spots with Tilex
> 14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap
hair in super absorbent towel.
> 15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
> 16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on xhead
> 17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>
> AND NOW
> How to Shower Like a Man.
>
> 1. Take off clothing while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave
them
in a pile.
> 2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
weiner
at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
> 3. Look in the mirror, look at your wiener and scratch your ass.
> 4. Get in the shower.
> 5. Wash your face.
> 6. Wash your armpits.
> 7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
> 8. Make fart noised (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they
sound
in the shower.
> 9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area .
> 10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
> 11. Shampoo your hair.
> 12. Make shampoo mohawk.
> 13. Pee.
> 14. Rinse off and get out of the shower
> 15. Partially dry off, fail to notice water on floor because curtain
was
hanging out of tub the whole time.
> 16. Admire wiener size in the mirror again.
> 17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
> 18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife,
pull
off towel, shake weiner at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
> 19. Throw wet towel on bed.
.
.
.
sooooo true!!!
__________________
There will come a time in your life when you will ask yourself a series of questions. Am I happy with who I am? Am I happy with the people around me? Am I happy with what I'm doing? Am I happy with the way my life is going? Do I have a life or am I just living? Do not let these questions strain or trouble you just point yourself in the direction of your dreams find your strengh in the sound and make your transition.
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14-01-2004 - 14:41
