Reg.: Sep 2001
Location: golden times
Posts: 423

was für zwischendurch

Ein Wiener Sandler durchstöbert auf seiner täglichen Suche nach Nahrung die Wiener Mülltonnen. Dabei stößt er in einem Kübel auf einen zerbrochenen Spiegel und weicht erschrocken zurück - "Jö, a Leich!".
Er rennt zur nächsten Polizeistation und meldet "I hob' a Leich' gfund'n, im dritt'n Mistküb'l ban Stefansplotz, schaut's eich des on!" Die Polizei fährt sofort zum besagten Mistkübel, ein Beamter öffnet die Tonne, erbleicht und sagt "Mei' Gott, des is jo ana' vo uns!"
Besagter Polizist nimmt den Spiegel als Beweismittel mit, vergisst ihn in seiner Uniform. Abends dann daheim durchwühlt seine Tochter seine Jacke nach einer kleinen Taschengeld-aufbesserung - findet den Spiegel, und ruft: "Mama, Mama, da Papa hot a Freindin!" Die Mutter eilt herbei und sieht sich den Spiegel an: "A' so a schiache Sau!"

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Reg.: Sep 2003
Location: fiji islands
Posts: 278

das geht! haha

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www.myspace.com/tigersushi

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Reg.: Oct 2001
Location: 1030 eudah!
Posts: 1219

!

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FRESSSH Club - Vienna
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Upcomming dj dates
01.03.2013 - Vollkontakt Localsparty - WERK,Vienna


Soon - FRESSSH
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“Change will lead to insight far more often than insight will lead to change.”
----------------------------------
YYAARRRPPPPP!!!
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FRESSSH / Resident r.i.p! / pro|tune / City Warriors/ Synergetic

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Reg.: Sep 2001
Location: golden times
Posts: 423

für die karaoke fans unter euch:

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Optimismus ist eine Form von Informationsmangel!

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Reg.: Oct 2001
Location: 1030 eudah!
Posts: 1219

1

__________________
FRESSSH Club - Vienna
----------------------------------
Upcomming dj dates
01.03.2013 - Vollkontakt Localsparty - WERK,Vienna


Soon - FRESSSH
----------------------------------
“Change will lead to insight far more often than insight will lead to change.”
----------------------------------
YYAARRRPPPPP!!!
----------------------------------
FRESSSH / Resident r.i.p! / pro|tune / City Warriors/ Synergetic

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Reg.: Dec 2001
Location: Secret Tweaker Pad
Posts: 1035

A guy with a huge orange head goes in to see a doctor. The doctor says, "How did you get such a huge orange head?"

The guy says, "Well, one day I was walking down the beach when I tripped over an old lantern.

A genie came out and said, ' I'll grant you three wishes, whatever you desire... what is your first wish?' I said, ' I'd like all the money I could ever spend.' The genie went Poof!, and there it was, all the money I could ever spend.

Then he said, ' what is your second wish?' I said, ' I'd like a beautiful woman to love me, someone I could enjoy this money with.' The genie went Poof!, and there she was, a gorgeous girl who immediately loved me.

"Then the genie said, 'and what is your third wish?'... and I think this is where I went wrong... I said, I'd like a huge orange head."

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"hey wie gehts euch?""hey wie gehts euch?""hey wie gehts euch?""hey wie gehts euch?""hey wie gehts euch?"

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Reg.: Dec 2001
Location: Secret Tweaker Pad
Posts: 1035

One night, Bob receives a call from the Emergency Room doctor.

The doctor says, "Your wife was in a serious car accident, and I'm afraid I have some bad news and good news. The bad news is she has lost all use of both arms and both legs, and will need help eating and going to the bathroom for the rest of her life."

Bob says, "My God... What's the good news?"

"I'm kidding," the doctor says."She's dead."

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Reg.: Dec 2001
Location: Secret Tweaker Pad
Posts: 1035

10 Most Famous Uses of [shudder] the dreaded "F word"

10. "What the fuck was that?" - Mayor Of Hiroshima, 1945
9. "Look at all them fucking Indians!" - Custer, 1877
8. "Any fucking idiot could understand that." - Einstein, 1938
7. "It does so fucking look like her!" - Picasso, 1926
6. "How the fuck did you work that out?" - Pythagorus, 126 BC
5. "You want WHAT on the fucking ceiling?" - Michelangelo, 1566
4. "Where the fuck are we?" - Amelia Earhart, 1937
3. "Scattered fucking showers....My ass!" - Noah, 4314 BC
2. "Aw c'mon. Who the fuck's going to find out?" - Bill Clinton,1999





And number 1 . . .







drum roll.........................








1. "Geez, I didn't think they'd get this fucking mad." - Saddam Hussein, March 19, 2003

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"hey wie gehts euch?""hey wie gehts euch?""hey wie gehts euch?""hey wie gehts euch?""hey wie gehts euch?"

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Reg.: Sep 2001
Location:
Posts: 1424

"Where the fuck is all this water coming from?"
- Captain of the Titanic

"That's not a real fucking gun."
- John Lennon

"Who's gonna fucking find out?"
- Richard Nixon

"Heads are going to fucking roll."
- Anne Boleyn

"Let the fucking woman drive."
- Commander of Space Shuttle

"Fuck a duck."
- Walt Disney

"Why?- Because its fucking there!"
- Edmund Hilary

"I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain?"
- Joan of Arc

"I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in my head."
- J.F.K.

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